The first meeting with a mediator is often called a Mediation Information & Assessment Meeting or MIAM.
The meeting will generally last about an hour, and will give you an opportunity to tell the mediator about your situation, and the issues that need to be decided. The mediator will tell you about the mediation process and other options for reaching agreements.
At the end of the meeting, the mediator will tell you whether your case is suitable for mediation, and you can decide whether you want to proceed with mediation or explore another option for resolving issues. The mediator can also give you information about other services which provide help and support.
If you agree, the mediator might also refer you to other organisations who can help you, such as those who can offer counselling, debt advice, or information about how to parent co-operatively after separation, where these are relevant.
If you have children who are over the age of 10, the mediator will discuss with you their rights to have their views taken into account. This is an important part of the process designed to support the health and well-being of the children as well as to help parents come to good workable decisions. Research shows this part of the process brings real benefits to your children and to parents as they make decisions for the family.
Do I have to go to a MIAM?
If you want to take your case to court then, in most cases, you will have to attend a MIAM before making an application. There are only a few specific circumstances where this requirement does not apply (mainly involving domestic abuse). This is because court action should be used only where the protection of the law is required or, as a last resort when alternative ways of resolving things haven’t worked.
If the court has told you that your ex has made an application to resolve issues related to children or finances following divorce or dissolution of a civil partnership, the judge will also expect you to have attended a MIAM, unless the same specific circumstances apply.
Going to a MIAM isn’t the same as going to Mediation. A MIAM will help you understand the options available to sort out the issues that need to be resolved, and to choose the best option.
This flowchart from Resolution sets out some of the other options that a mediator may discuss with you.
Ruth Hawkins, Partner
